My 5th grade math teacher would be proud!

I have never been good with numbers. This may explain why...

The Evolution of teaching Math

Teaching Math In 1950
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1960
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math In 1970
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?

Teaching Math In 1980
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math In 1990
A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong answers.)

Teaching Math In 2005
Un hachero vende una carretada de maderapara $100. El costo de la producción es $80 ...

And we wonder why this world is in so much trouble.

Down South where they say y’all...

So… I had a lovely weekend sharing quality time with the fam, in Southern Illinois. Just to be clear… this is really Southern Illinois. I know many people that think anywhere south of Chicago city limits is Southern Illinois… Not true. Southern Illinois doesn’t truly begin until about 30 miles South of Champaign-Urbana in a little town called Arcola, population 2,652. Why do I believe this? Because starting in Arcola, people name their children things like Billy Bob and Peggy Jean… At lease those were the names of the two newlyweds that were being congratulated on the billboard of the local gas station. It’s also South of Arcola that you will find towns like Ina (population 2,455), Dix, Centralia, Pesotum, Neoga (which, as some will remember, is pronounced Neooooga, with a grunt) and Cairo (pronounced Caro… like the sugary sweet white maple syrup.)

Now, I went to school in Carbondale, so, I should be used to that drive, right? WRONG… it’s 5.5 hours from Chicago to Carbondale… I hit mile marker 300 (just north of “Chambana”) and almost died realizing that I had to go to mile #59. I survived however, it will be some time before I do that alone again. Anyway, I love my family. Dad, Stacy, John (her fiancé), Aunt Erdine and I spend the entire weekend playing cards and shootin’ the shit and I even enjoyed having Stacy’s little nose breathing pugs there… we bonded.

OK… that’s not the reason for this post. I understand that the masses are truly concerned about who won the most Euchre games (Dad and Aunt Erdine I think) or who had the most impressive hearts win (Stacy… the little brat defeated me 67 to 200… I shot the moon twice and still came in dead last! Damn!)

No, no, no… the purpose of this post is to discuss my almamater. Southern Illinois University at Carbondale also known as SIU. The home of the Salukis and what is supposed to be considered my glory days. Stacy, John and I took a “day trip” into Carbondale. I was excited to see the old stompin’ ground… really. I remembered a certain energy that you only find in a college town. Guess what we found… disappointment all around! The place was filthy and more red-neck than I remembered! It was a ghost town! There were no drunk college kids, there were no sun bathers in the fields, there were no students hanging out on campus, there was nothing. The place was dead! I realize it’s July, but, typically there are these things called summer classes that are designed, in part to populate the area. I also realize that we were there on Saturday afternoon but, still, in my vast experience of summer living in Carbondale, I expected to see college kids having fun! Nope.

Here’s the kicker. We decided to go back into the college town for a few drinks in the evening so that John could experience the Nightlife. We walked in to Stix at around 8:30 pm to find 5 people playing pool. I understand that 8:30 is early for college kids, but why, oh Lord in Heaven, why, were there still only about 20 people in the entire bar when we left at midnight? Unbelievable! And even worse… walking out onto the strip was just disappointing… no drunkin’ brawls, no one was puking, there were no rowdy guys cat-calling any scantily clad college girls that look to be 12. IT WAS QUIET, PEOPLE!!! THAT’S WRONG!

Then… I heard a little bell… ahhh… music to my ears… It’s Winston the Bagel Man. And suddenly, Carbondale is a fabulous place again!

80's Mania!!!

Oh my gosh!!! I was just given the gift that keeps on giving! One of my rep friends, in the spirit of friendship and the 80's gave me... prepare yourself... this is totally radical... I mean Crazy to the max, man...

A RUBIK'S CUBE!

Now, you all know how easily amused I am right?! Now imagine my excitement when he invited me to a 80's party complete with TWISTER?! Oh yeah folks... I'll be playing twister and dressing the part of the 80's chick next week with other designer friends... gosh, do I have any AquaNet? How cool is that!

Go on... be jealous!

Now imagine that same person, who's already brought such joy to my day, next offers me tickets to today's Cubs game (Cubs v. Pirates), which I have to turn down because 1.) I don't have anyone to go with me and 2.) I'm road trippin' it down south!!! Much dissappointment but... What a guy that Hunter is... Thanks Hunter!

Cheers!

The largest muscle in the body is Gluteus Maximus... Yes folks, that's the butt... the derriere, tush, behind, bottom, rear or, my favorite, aft extremity. But the most important muscle in the body is the heart.

From the moment it begins beating until the moment it stops, the human heart works tirelessly, beating an average of 72 times per minute... that's more than two and a half billion times in an average lifetime, without ever pausing to rest. It's no wonder that we use the "heart" in so many daily phrases. Verbiage used to describe a feeling, an experience, a desire, a promise, an emotion, a description or a place.

A heart of gold,
A heart of stone,
A heart throb (like Shawn Cassidy in the early eighties... yum),
A heart to heart talk,
A heart-warming experience,
After your own heart,
Change of heart,
Cold hands warm heart,
Cross my heart and hope to die,
Cry your heart out (been there, done that!),
Have a heart,
Wearing your heart on your sleeve,
Heart and soul (great song),
Heart wrenching,
Heart warming,
Heartbreak Hotel (Elvis IS the King),
Home is where the heart is,
In my heart of hearts,
Know by heart,
Lose your heart,
Melt the heart,
Near and dear to my heart,
Open your heart,
Serious as a heart-attack,
Set your heart on something,
Sob your heart out,
Steal someone's heart,
The heart has its reasons,
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach,
Warms the cockles of my heart,
What becomes of the broken-hearted,
With a hearty hiho Silver,
Young at heart.

While the phrases listed above are appropriate, the most commonly used phrase that includes this human body part is "broken hearted." I have often wondered where this term came from. When, in history, did we begin equating love and feelings with this, the most important body part? In researching this "phenomenon," I did not find definitiveve answer but... I have found that the heart, as a euphemism has been used by Chinese philosophers as early as 370 - 300 BC.

"A Great man is he who does not lose his childlike heart." - Mencius (Mengzi Meng-tse).

Similarly, the heart as a descriptor, has been used in the Bible.

"The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, while the heart of the fool is in the house of entertainment." - Bible. Sacred Scriptures of Christians and Judaism

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?" - Bible. Sacred Scriptures of Christians and Judaism

And, as I suspected, the heart being equated to love has been used by Poets.

"Whether you call my heart affectionate, or you call it womanish: I confess, that to my misfortune, it is soft." - Ovid BC 43-18 AD Roman Poet

After learning this, I started to wonder where and when the modern shape of the heart begin? I found this:

"There are a few ancient symbols that recur through the ages. One of these symbols - the heart - means many things to many people. Just how did the stylized heart shape become the icon for love and the human soul? Let's work our way back in history:

The heart symbol as we know it today, was popularized in the Victorian era over a hundred years ago. They loved the romantic heart shape and embellished it in many ways; but they didn't invent it. Where did it come from?

Getting closer to the source, the Egyptian ab, or "heart soul", apparently bears a remarkable resemblance to the stained glass Christian iconographs. The story of the ab was that one of the Egyptian's seven souls came directly from the mother's heart, in the form of holy lunar blood and would descend to the womb and take the shape of her child. The Catholic church claims that the symbol of the heart (Sacred Heart) began when Saint Margaret Marie Alacoque had a vision in the late 17th century. She saw a heart shape surrounded by a crown of thorns.
There is evidence that it is still older. Centuries earlier than Saint Alacoque, the heart symbol was incorporated in a number of stained glass windows and cloister decorations. Basically, the heart symbol, in Christian iconography was a stand in for the soul of Jesus. The Centurion who pierced Jesus' heart at the crucifixion with a lance was the first reference to the sacred heart in the scriptures - John 19:34

The most intriguing explanation for the heart symbol is linked to erotic love - and lies within the ruins of a classical city in North Africa. In the 7th century BC, in the city-state of Cyrene, there was a valuable plant called Silphium. The commercial trade of this now extinct species of fennel made Cyrene one of the richest cities in Africa until the founding of Alexandria. We are only now coming to understand why the Silphium plant was so highly valued that it was harvested to extinction. Silphium grew only in the small, upland, ecological zones surrounding the city of Cyrene in North Africa. Trade based on this now extinct species of Giant Fennel was of great commercial importance to Cyrene. Just what was so special about this plant?

Silphium has left its mark in modern society in a way that has not previously been recognized. Have you ever wondered why the human heart - the repository and the embodiment of romantic love - is always drawn stylized instead of in the natural shape of the human heart organ? The answer is rooted in the ancient function of Silphium! And the connection between this artistic convention and Silphium is found in the coinage of Cyrene, which features a seed pod of the revered plant."

Huh... Chinese philosophers and a plant seem to have brought us to the "heart of the matter." Who'd-a-thunk?

Lastly, in my research, as un-scientific as it may be (thanks to Google), I have uncovered that there is actually a Broken Heart Martini. Yup... we've taken our collective devastation into the bottle.

I'll be perfecting this recipe over the next few weeks. Cheers!